R A T I O N A L I S A T I O N - The FINAL key word for me in my efforts to cope with and overcome agoraphobia. Apart from the fact that agoraphobics now have steps to use in alleviating their panics, which is a great help to their recovery as a programme into recovery - something else is required !
I found thinking very logically about various situations and rationalising these situations helped me mentally to put things in perspective. This has always been a very important part of my recovery and it still is today ! I will give examples :

1) When in a busy, crowded area, such as a shopping centre/bus stations/ railway stations/air terminals, look around you and observe other people - are they collapsing with panic, are they running away? BELIEVE IN YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE EXACTLY THE SAME AS THEY ARE: A human being with all your faculties in full working order can comfort and calm yourself with these REAL thoughts of RATIONALISATION.
2) Use this method in any local situations, supermarket/department stores/ chemist/clothes boutique. OBSERVE what is going on around you and believe that you are one of the crowd and your body can be just as trustworthy as theirs. Your body is silently restoring every nerve and fibre all the time.
3) When you go to a cinema/theatre/meeting hall/school room etc. - concentrate on your surroundings and become interested in what is going on, become involved. This will take effort and practise at first, but gradually you will start relaxing in all of these surroundings and automatically you will begin taking a genuine interests in life again.
4) Finally, and the most important rationalisation of all - panic - when you feel it starting, stop, think, breathe, THINK - this has happened before and what has happened to me? NOTHING! and it never will. Nothing can be or will be as bad as those first few panics and you are still there afterwards, so what could happen now? NOTHING - TALK TO YOURSELF - comfort, console and reassure yourself, because after all, you are the one that comes to terms with you.

I AM TODAY A FULLY RECOVERED AGORAPHOBIC and have been for many years, as some of you know, but I am still aware that it is important to rationalise. This helps me to keep things and situations in perspective. Since knowing others with agoraphobia which was five years ago, I have formed an opinion that they are different from others in a special way - they have experienced fear to the fullest and lived with it! You can recover, don't be misled by feelings that happen day by day. These feelings are of JOY-HAPPINESS-FRUSTRATION-PRIDE- CONFESSION ETC.. While you exist you will have these experiences -everyone does. Accept and recognise them, rationalise them, keep them in perspective ! We would not wish to be without the joyful emotions and happy experiences but need to analyse the others and - LEARN TO LIVE - LOVE TO LEARN TO LIVE.

RATIONALISE your shakes/dizziness/aching muscles/pumping heart/ head and eyes etc.and ask the questions : HAVE I HAD LITTLE SLEEP ? HAVE I ATEN PROPERLY ? AM I GETTING OVER A VIRUS? HAVE I OVER-EXERCISED ? AM I RUSHING WITHOUT REALLY NOTICING ? AM I PUSHING MYSELF ? Did you just have an argument/crash dieting/getting a cold/ had many late nights? REALLY THINK ABOUT IT AND RATIONALISE THOSE FEELINGS !!!! RYAN

You all know now to stay and face, accept your fear and (if possible) in certain circumstances and situations not to run, as the feeling of defeat can make us worse than the actual panic situation that perhaps you were in at the time. To recover from agoraphobia you have to learn to stop thinking of 'agoraphobia'. I know that it is easier said than done, but like everything else with practise it does become easier.
Stop talking to yourself about your agoraphobia, the more you personally talk to yourself about agoraphobia it brings in the negative side of your condition and with the negative attitude like that it, will take you longer to recover or even think about living a normal lifestyle. When you get up in the morning, instead of saying to yourself, 'Yuk! Here I go again, what will happen today when I have to go.....? ' Try saying, 'Today I am going to have a good day, its a new opportunity to see change for the better'. 'I will know what to do when the time comes' and 'Everything will be all right'. Practise saying it in front of the mirror and smile even if you don't feel like it. MAKE YOURSELF! And then during the day when anticipatory thoughts of fear flash in your mind, repeat these constructive and optimistic words again and again for they are not unrealistic for you will recover.
Try to keep yourself and your mind in particular busy, but not to the degree that you over do it. Take the opportunity to start a brand new hobby or something you have never done before. Phone a friend and offer a suggestion. I also recommend 'keep fit' - you can buy a video, tape or book with all the exercises in it and do it at home. This is a good way to work off tension and is very helpful in getting a good night's sleep. I would like also to give you something to think about. Generally speaking most of us have got into a fear cycle by confusion, not knowing what was wrong etc., and it grew with mental fatigue into a phobias, added with extra stress and trauma in our lives. It is of no value to return to the past to find answers but the important step now is to get out of the cycle, now you know what it is all about. Take a good look at reality. We all realise that we need help from others in this situation, mostly understanding at the beginning, someone to lean on - the last thing we need is sympathy or self-pity. Forget the negative and get on with living - life is too short to waste. Take a course in productive issues that suits your personality and interests. This certainly helped me. Good Luck . JAN -A Recovered Agoraphobic.

As a fully recovered Agoraphobic, it has become my custom to observe other people and their behaviour in different circumstances - this observing has helped me to rationalise my own fears and feelings of uneasiness. All agoraphobics think they are different from everybody else, they also think it shows like a neon sign flashing on their forehead announcing the fact that they are feeling panicky. Of course, no one but ourselves actually know this - our relatives and friends cannot read our minds, and as you know we are all experts at keeping our feelings under control in front of others. Many of us before embarking on a shopping expedition, social gathering or a visit to a restaurant will, before leaving home go to the toilet many times (bladder or bowel). So do many other people who are not suffering from agoraphobia. I suffered this way myself quite chronically with nervous diarrhoea and I sympathise with any of you in this present state, but believe me, when you learn to relax mentally and physically, this part of your problem starts to heal too and the desire to run in and out of the toilet lessens as you progress in your recovery. Now, getting back to observing people - for the past sixteen years I have worked in the Hospitality Business and I have observed that nine out of ten people whenever they enter the restaurant or social gathering, at the first opportunity they will call me over and quietly ask where the toilets are, of course they don't need to go, but they need reassurance where the toilet is and of course later they use it a few times, whatever their reason is. Sometimes it has been a straight out escape or excuse for them even though they are not agoraphobic. When you are out, never be afraid to ask immediately where the toilet is, it is a normal and quite a necessary question to ask - also notice those around you and what others are doing, you will be surprised to see the same enquiries and realise you are no different from others in that situation. Remember, you are not alone, you are part of the human race, rationalise situations and your behaviour - just realise that at the present moment you may be extra-sensitive and you do have to work on de-sensitising yourself (mind and body) to a normal level. You will probably always remain a very warm, sensitive, caring person and happy and secure knowing you have had to cope with extra added fears or are now coping - the extra advantage is you will enjoy life and people to the fullest extent - we are Blessed. VERA

* Check out the premises with a friend on a quiet day. * Get to know the rooms so you will be more at ease. * Check exits, rest rooms and ventilation for fresh air. * Select where you would most likely be comfortable sitting. * Do this slowly and practise stomach breathing as you go. * If not confident - don't hesitate to tell staff, people will go out of their way to help you and make sure that you enjoy your evening out - show your I.D. Card. * Remember that you are a pioneer for other agoraphobics. * Know where you will be parking on the night. * Give yourself plenty of time to prepare yourself mentally and your personal grooming. * Brush up on your quick iso-metric relaxation and breathing control. * Take and play favourite music tape or CD in the car. * For distraction look at other cars, number plate, number of different colours of cars, this has proved successful distraction. * Stop lights are a great time to practise breathing control keeping your breath even and rhythmical. * On arriving keep relaxed - untense your fists, shake arms and loosen up - important, make sure you are not tense in the neck and shoulder area. Be aware of dropping your shoulders naturally. * Order something simple, don't feel as thought you have to eat all. * Don't feel pressed to stay longer that you feel is right for you. * YOU WILL ENJOY YOUR FIRST NIGHT EATING OUT.

MAKE A WONDERFUL DISCOVERY OF WHO YOU ARE : - No matter what has happened in your life, no matter how much you have or have not done, or failed, or what you think of yourself at this very moment !
YOU ARE NOT -a 'wash out' -a coward -hopeless -a person who cannot do anything YOU CAN RECOVER - Life is not over for you, but you do have to accept that you now have to change your habits in many ways !
CHANGE A NEGATIVE ATTITUDE TO A POSITIVE AND YOU CHANGE YOU. It will help change your world, to do the things you want to choose to do.WHATEVER THE MIND CAN CONCEIVE AND WILL DARE TO BELIEVE, WITH HELP AND KNOWLEDGE, YOU CAN ACHIEVE .
Your attitude will help YOU learn to enjoy the good feelings of life.A way to fight weeds is to plant thick, bulky healthy grass! The way to fight a negative thought is to verbalise a positive statement !
When negative thoughts - which bring depression and gloomy outlook - are holding back the good, the positive thought - it is because we all have ourselves on our minds (not in a self-way but a programmed heightened awareness). To get out of depression and negative hurdles, the best thing is to do something ! ACTION ! get up and get going again. NO MATTER WHICH ONE OF THE RECOVERY STEPS YOU PICK - ACT - it helps to uncondition our thinking also, and no matter what happens on your programme, look for the good and you will find it - A positive attitude does not mean NOT TO RECOGNISE THE NEGATIVE, BUT REFUSE TO DWELL ON THEM. When you feel that mighty 'on rush' of a negative emotion or thought, HOW DO YOU HANDLE IT ? Admit it, face it, BUT DON'T GIVE IN TO IT.
Negative thoughts are garbage and you can't feed on garbage and stay healthy, physically nor mentally - put garbage into your thoughts and you get garbage out - put good healthy positive thoughts into your mind - the result, healthy natural outlook and action and motivation - cleared thinking, no confusion !!

WORK WITH CONTROL -Reslant your thoughts towards THE POSITIVE MEMORIES. Think of your mind as a tape cassette even though past memories are there, record over them the CORRECT STEPS of ATTITUDE and ACTION. Take more notice of your SUCCESSES than you did of your failures.

Replace each weak thought with a STRONG one - Replace each negative thought with a POSITIVE one - Replace each gloomy thought with an UPLIFTING one - Replace each apprehensive thought with one of TRUST - Replace each fearful thought with a COURAGEOUS one - Replace each worry with a CONFIDENT one - Replace each resignation with a DETERMINED thought - Replace each complaining thought with a GRATEFUL one - Replace each pessimistic thought with an OPTIMISTIC one - Replace each tense thought with a HUMOROUS one - Replace each critical thought with a COMPLIMENTARY one - Replace each futile thought with a MEANINGFUL one - Replace each judgmental thought with an ACCEPTABLE one -

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You would be wise to include self-motivated relaxation and although there seem to be a million things more important than relaxing, YOU are the most important person in your own life, and if you don't stop to think about your own needs once in a while you will not be able to figure out how to relax.

Relax - that's an easy word to say. Unfortunately it's an easier word to say than do. We all recognise the importance of relaxing, but we need to do something about it seriously to get anywhere. But how to relax? GOOD QUESTION ! If relaxing and controlled breathing were easy to do, you wouldn't have to learn it. Each person has his/her own particular likes and dislikes, and no one likes to relax in the same way. Where many hours spend in the garden might the perfect relaxing situation for one, a day spent napping on a lounge suite in front of T.V. might suit another. When you think about relaxing what is the first thing that comes to mind? HOW DO YOU LIKE TO RELAX ?

Some suggestions:- Sit down in a comfortable chair and kick off your shoes. Make sure the room is relatively quiet - having the room darkened is more relaxing. Remain quiet and calm for about 10 mins. if you can. You'll be surprised the effect this has on your mind and body. Pull the curtains and lie down on the bed - starting at the bottom of your body, try to tense and relax every muscle in your body, separately from your feet up, once you have reached your face and neck, remain motionless for a few minutes.

IF YOU CAN'T REMAIN MOTIONLESS REPEAT THIS SEVERAL TIMES - this can be so relaxing that some people do fall asleep.

Some find it easy to sit down in a quiet place, shutting their eyes for a few minutes. It's very important for each one to have your own time to reflect and think about the events of the day or to just get the events of the day out of your system. Set aside a time each day for quiet relaxation. You don't have to take a relaxation class or spend a lot of money to learn how to make some time for yourself - 10 - 15 mins, and you will feel so much better on a day to day basis and makes you a happier person in the long run.

* Put on your favourite cd - soft, easy music and sit on the floor for a few minutes absorbing the mood for a few minutes, then do a few deep stretches slow and deliberate to the rhythm of the music in slow motion. This helps to relax muscles and relieve tension. * For a change, try eating dinner without the television on and dine with a few candles - candles set a relaxing tone anytime. Simple habits like these are the nicest ways to relax. * If you are over-tense, exercise can be an outlet for the tension, so go ahead and give yourself that extra time to unwind.

IMPORTANT POINTS Take the guidance that comes and your decisions will turn out right. When you have done that, and all else you can do - don't try to do anymore-Stop and wait-Relax-Be quiet and don't get in a fuss.-You have done everything possible, so do not fight it. TIME WILL MAKE IT A PERMANENT REALITY

"Too many agoraphobics are accused of escaping responsibilities - that statement is made in ignorance." It is symptoms and not understanding them that create can misleading neurotic statements. When and if agoraphobia is categorised 'nervously ill' it is because the suffering of physical symptoms is a strain on the nervous system and therefore effects the body physically! This can of course end up making you ill. It is interesting to realise that there is a big physical side to it - the fear is the actual point - but it goes through into the physical dimension in a big way. This physical aspect is largely misunderstood by the sufferer and the public.

"An agoraphobic may seem to have failed so often in the attempt to recover that the positive attitude starts to take second place to find recovery - but the determination rises once again for more effort, still seeking recovery" With the correct information and guidance an agoraphobic can recover.

Normally when we are afraid, we accept a racing heart, rapid breathing, spasms of fear, because we know that when the cause of the fear goes, these reactions also will pass. Our feelings become calm because we no longer think fearfully. An agoraphobic, especially cured agoraphobics have to realise that the first fear, as above is normal and is not to be confused with the second state of fear.

Agoraphobia drains off mental energy that could be used for productive purposes. Agoraphobics can cope with many productive purposes if their energy is channelled in the right direction.

AGORAPHOBIA CONDITIONING: Classical conditioning is behaviour change induced by physical illness to nerves by suffering and fatigue. (Only temporary and cannot be called learning!) TEMPORARY CLASSICAL CONDITIONING: is particularly important in understanding how we develop emotional behaviour. When we develop an initial fear, we learn to fear a stimulus that has been combined with another frightening stimuli. An anxiety state does not happen purposely to you, it could be lack of the right attitude towards panics, or the wrong approach. We have a tense approach towards panic situations which makes it worse!! We need the correct approach with understanding and knowledge, we will correct the old pattern and gradually the new pattern will remain above the old ones!!!!

Changing your mood and attitude is one of the most important steps to consciously control the symptoms of stress. Understanding is the only way to start recovery.

You can create a condition that is CONSTRUCTIVE -CREATIVE -POSITIVE At the moment these thought might be repelled by your mind - and you don't think you could change them GIVE YOURSELF MORE CREDIT - CHANGE YOUR MIND !
That is filled with old defeatist attitudes. If you hold on to TRUSTING IN YOURSELF and the CORRECT POSITIVE THOUGHTS and you will create about you an atmosphere of SUCCESS, WELL-BEING AND CONFIDENCE - TO UNDERSTAND AND ACCEPT PANIC AND NOT TO BE AFRAID OF IT !!! REMEMBER - It is only these panic symptoms that make you lose confidence in yourself.

"Treatment is directed toward achieving de-sensitisation - which means a reduction of exaggerated body sensations and emotional responses to normal intensity. Recovery lies, not in discarding all sensations as we believe it is - but just as stated. Reduction to normal intensity"

You do have a great determination within you or you would not have fought for so long to find an answer to your panics! you only have to believe in yourself once again and the strength within you will be released!!!

DO’S AND DON’TS FOR AGORAPHOBIA -DO’S 1. DO - remember to breathe properly, it stops panics, failure to do so can lead to dizziness and breathlessness. 2. DO - remember to listen to what you are saying to yourself, as it is in talking to yourself the wrong way that gives rise to fear and subsequently, panic. 3. DO - remember not to add fear to feelings. Rationalize. 4. DO - try and think more of your achievements and less of your failure. 5. DO - ,think positively - make “I can” and “ I will” your motto. 6. DO - respect yourself for what you know you can do well. Give yourself credit for it, the same as anyone else would, and not just think of the thing you can’t do. 7. Most important of all, DO - remember that panic attacks will not harm you and they always pass over.

DON’TS 1. DON’T - allow the memory of your first panic attack to haunt you. Remember that at the time you suffered your first attack, your anxiety level and in all probability your physical health, combined to make you vulnerable to panic. 2. DON’T - forget the time when being out on your own was a normal routine and not a major operation, like it is now. Remember and know that you are still the same person, and you have been through reflex actions for protection. 3. DON’T - adopt an avoidance technique. Remember that the only way to overcome any phobia is to recognize the striation, or thing, that is causing your fear. 4. DON’T - forget to give yourself credit for achievement, as most sufferers are more inclined to dwell on failures, to the exclusion of success. 5. DON’T - rush into situations. Pace yourself properly, as rushing can cause physical symptoms like palpitations and breathlessness and a sufferer can add fear to them and create panic. 6. DON’T - be too disappointed if you don’t succeed all the time. Give yourself credit for trying, and remember the old saying: “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again!” Facts and knowledge - the things you didn’t have before, but are now armed with. 7. ABOVE ALL * DON’T FORGET THAT YOU CAN RECOVER FROM AGORAPHOBIA. * A REFLEX ACTION CAN BE REVERSED * A CONDITIONING CAN BE UNCONDITIONED * HABITS CAN BE CHANGED - (PRACTICAL AND MENTAL )

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